Abusive People

crow and mockingbirdThis morning I was reading a post by a friend, she spoke about a dream she had that her mother was in. It turns out that her mother was a very angry, negative and abusive person. In the dream, my friend had hoped that her mother might apologize or at least show some remorse for what she had done. That, of course never happened.

I have thought about what I could say to ease the pain of that friend and had a realization that I hope helps many. You see, I know a lot about abusive people, as I have been around them far more than I like to reflect upon. I had an abusive spouse that was abusive in every way that one could be. I grew up with a mother that never saw the sunshine, only the rain. Her entire life revolved around pain and misery and she was more than happy to spread it around. Let’s not forget those abusive friendships, abusive work relationships/encounters, etc.

So, while pondering what words of advice I could give to help my friend move past this pain, I began to think about all the abusive people I’ve encountered in my lifetime. It all really came down to something so simple and true.

All the pain, misery, abuse and negativity that comes from someone is because of them. It is not because of you or anything you have done. It is not any failing on your part, but on theirs. People are angry, abusive, negative, and hurtful because of themselves and their own past. They were not born this way but somewhere down the line they allowed themselves to become it.

You are not the root of how they behave… You were just simply there. 

The best way to let it all go is to forgive them for not being able to rise above their own history and become something better than what has happened to them. Forgive yourself for allowing their issues to get inside your own head and cause you pain. Forgive and let it go. Holding on to the pain doesn’t make them any better a person, it doesn’t change what they did or what they will do in the future. It changes nothing. It holds you back from moving forward and from finding your own peace. Let it go. Forgive.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

1st Day of Spring!

This morning I thought I’d take a quick walk around the lake so I got up while it was still very dark outside and made my way over to Radnor Lake. I arrived about 30 minutes before the sunrise so I was able to capture some great photos of the 1st Day of Spring this year.

A Time of New Beginnings.

Spring is the birth of life after after the long (and this year’s harsh) winter. The Earth comes alive with the buzz and hum of new growth and new life. Soon the landscape will be painted with colors from every spectrum. The air will be filled with all kinds of lovely fragrances and the sun will warm us all.

Here are the photos from this morning’s sunrise photoshoot. Click on the images to see the larger view.

To see more of my photos visit and subscribe to my photo blog Here!


Enjoying Earth’s Magic,
Raventalker

Quote of the Week

I’ve been pairing up some quotes from my blog posts and photos that I have taken and thought I would start sharing these images each week or at least until I run out of them :-)

Cardinal reminds us that no matter what time of the day or year it is, there is always the opportunity to recognize the importance of our life purpose.

cardinal importance

You can view all of them on my pinterest board if you like
http://www.pinterest.com/raventalker/quotes-from-the-raven/

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

In the Dream

gray globeRaindrops falling from the night sky
Magical dreams begin when I shut my eyes

Drifting in and out of some magical astral plane
Waking suddenly when I think I hear someone shout my name

Wondering what these symbols in the night might mean
Trying hard to remember all the things I’ve just seen

Scrambled and encoded with a mystery still unknown
Visions pass through my mind like a wild and crazy cyclone

Is it a message from the great beyond?
Silently, I wait for Spirit to respond

Some say dreaming is a healing of sort
All I know is it’s a place where I am suddenly transport

From here to there and all over the place
Bringing always a story that by morning I’ll do my best to retrace

Raindrops falling from the night sky
Shush now there’s a new movie playing just behind these  shut eyes.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

The Fairytale Update

>Wedding DreamsI heard a great quote today from a movie, a mother and daughter were talking about love and the whole fairytale idea of it all when the mother said “You’re knight and shining armor isn’t going to show up with a horse and carriage to rescue you… you need to update your fairytale baby!”.

Romantic stories of love have been told for centuries, every little girl grows up hearing these tall tales before she can even speak and then one wonders why we seek this thing called romance. Romance does still exist, it just doesn’t look like the picture painted in all those storybooks.

Today’s knight, instead of riding a horse and fighting fierce battles in shiny armor, he drives a car and has a 9 to 5. He has just as many issues as the damsel in distress and can sometimes need rescuing himself. He has bills to pay, obligations to fulfill and a boss to answer to just like the rest of us. The battles he fights are simply day to day getting by and getting ahead and the shiny armor is the light he carries within.

Think about the fairytale you are looking for… is it realistic or is it something of pure fiction? Do you even need rescuing? Maybe it’s time to update the storybook of your life … you never know, you might find that you are already living your own happily ever after. So stop thinking you need what others have written and write your own.

Many Blessings,
Raventalker

New Moon – New Beginnings

new beginningsToday is the New Moon and the End of the Month… So now we bid farewell to February and welcome in March with a new moon cycle. It is time to start those projects you’ve been wanting to get done, try new things, new techniques and possibly even new ways of thinking. 

Now is a good time to do an overlook of your life and get rid of anything that doesn’t belong. Start thinking about where you want the rest of the year to go and start doing the things to get you there. Keep positive thoughts and a positive outlook as you move forward and use the energy of this New Moon to help boost you to the new beginnings that you want/need in your life. 

Many Blessings, 
Raventalker